Nobody 749

December 25, 2008
Nobody #749

Nobody Asked Me But:

Then peeled the bells more loud and deep
Good is not dead nor doth it sleep
The wrong shall fail, the right, prevail,
With peace on earth, good will to men.

PC or not PC? That is the question.

Back to Playboy’s nude Virgin Mary. I would drop the subject if others would. But somebody at the LA Times wrote a “we’re not being PC, but” editorial condemning it.

The Times justifies its stand by writing “There is no sociopolitical message conveyed by this piece of soft porn.” Wrong and wrong again. First, a picture showing no naked body parts is hardly porn at any level. Secondly, the cover is clearly a sociopolitical statement. It says religion is not a sacred cow.

Of course your editorial was PC.<<<

GONE BUT NOT FORGOTTEN

The Neiman Marcus catalog. At least in the Turner mailbox. I wanted to buy his and hers vacation villas on the Rivera for only $5M each, but how can I without my NM bible?

Colored lights on the fountain in Beverly Hills. The fountain is still there but only in black and white.

Haagen Dazs in Westwood – Now where will we run into Dennis Franz loaded down with Christmas presents?

Mr. VHS – Yes, we love his replacement, but he brought countless hours of visual pleasure into our homes long before DVDs were more than a gleam in their inventor’s eye.

Jumbo Jims.* See below.

*Last week we made our first trip this bb season to Barbara’s old favorite, Dolores’s Coffee shop, only to find that the ownership and the menu had, after 50 years, changed. They no longer have her beloved Jumbo Jim, a better version of a Bib Mac, with a secret sauce born not far from tartar land.

The new owners have their own daily double – worse food at higher prices.<<<

THE ANSWER MAN

Q: What do you get when you add cream to lemonade?

A: An excellent drink called farmer’s lemonade. We sampled it at City Bakery in the Brentwood Market Tuesday.

Q: What is one thing that should be changed about college basketball?

A: Eliminate the center jump. The referee can toss a coin in the air more accurately than he/she can toss the ball. After the coin toss for first possession, return to the alternating possession rule as it now stands.

Q: A second change?

A: Bring back the much talked about but seldom practiced concept of “no harm, no foul.”

Q: What is your all-time favorite music group not called the Beatles?

A: I know it dates me – a lot – but my choice is the Mills Brothers.

Q: Now that gas prices have dropped far under their $4+ a gallon peak, what should be next?

A: Movie popcorn under $4 a bag. Way under.

Q: Which Christmas song does not get enough playing time?

A: Ertha Kit doing “Santa Baby.”

Q: What’s a live megadopler?

A: A dopler that is not yet dead. Actually it’s a fancy word that weather people use to make you think they have a clue about when it is going to shine or rain.

Q: How can we make Washington D.C. a safer city?

A: Send Darth Dick home next month, and tell him never to come back.

Q: Three straight Final Fours, Three straight 30-win seasons. Is there anything that Bruin coach Ben Howland isn’t good at?

A: Actually, there is. Parking. We watched him back his BMW into his spot at UCLA. His first pass was poor. But then he maneuvered it from poor to awful.<<<

FYI: Did you know that the incoming Congress is more religious than the rest of us, and more likely to be Jewish, Catholic or Mormon?<<<

As of November 1, there had been 103 homicides in Nogales, Sonora. So when the U.S. consul John Dinkelman said, while encouraging more Americans to visit that Mexican state, “I was also saddened because the beaches were empty. Fewer people are willing to take responsibility for their own safety and would rather just blow it off and not go,” he raised my hackles. (And at my age, raising one’s hackles is not easy.)

Take responsibility for my own safety? All right! While we are visiting Elizabeth this weekend, I think I will just rent a tank, arm myself with the latest weaponry head “South of the border, down Mexico way.”**

**An old Gene Autry song.<<<

I Want: Hillary to be a great Secretary of State.

I don’t want: Hillary to try to overshadow the President.

I suggest: that President Obama keep her on a leash – a long leash, but a leash nevertheless.<<<

Congressman Henry Waxman – “I do drive an American car. My Camry was made in “Kentucky.”<<<

HAPPY HOLIDAYS!

Nobody 748

Sunday, December 21, 2008
Nobody # 748

Nobody Asked Me But:

“Principle is often pragmatism’s guardian.”

Here is my early New Year’s wish for all of you:

Since many or most of our life decisions are about choosing between WHY BOTHER and WHY NOT, I wish for each of you a year filled with WHY NOTS.<<<

JIM’S PERSON OF THE YEAR
Not much suspense here. From dominating the early primaries, to the question marks raised by his troubling defeats by Hillary in the blue-collar states, to his huge victory on election day, to the smooth and seamless way he has thus far handled his current status, Barack Obama has named the year as few others have recently.<<<

JIM’S PERSONS OF THE YEAR

Another easy choice. The American voters. I choke a bit with emotion as I remember the pride in nation I felt on Election Day and again yesterday when the polls showed almost 80% of the people strongly supporting our first black president-elect.<<<

JIM’S SPORTSPERSON OF THE YEAR

The Tiger man. But wait! He only competed for half the year. It doesn’t matter. And put COMPETE in capital letters. Tiger’s victory at the Open in a playoff, ON ONE LEG, was, for me, one of the greatest moments in sports history.<<<

And isn’t it remarkable in this land of ours, with all its glory and all its terrible history of racism, that arguably the two most respected people, our President-elect and Tiger Woods, are biracial?<<<

News item: The sponsors of Proposition 8 asked the California Supreme Court to nullify the marriages of the estimated 18,000 same-sex couples who exchanged vows before voters approved the ballot initiative that outlawed gay unions.

Reaction: I think they’re wrong, but people of good conscience can oppose gay marriage. But only people of mean spirit would try to undo these marriage vows taken in good faith and sanctified by the law as then constituted.

Oh, and by the way, mean spirits, I hope that ex post facto gets shoved up your … throats.<<<

Overrated – “It’s A Wonderful Life.” Underrated - “Mr. MaGoo’s Christmas Carol.”<<<

QUESTIONS FOR THE ANSWER MAN

Q: Do you think the U.S. prison camp at Guantanamo Bay, Cuba, should be closed?

A: No keep it open. Try those who are detained legally, release those who are not and open a wing for politically corrupt American politicians. Make the governor of Illinois the first guest.

Q: Are the Lakers the worst 21-3 (21-4) (21-5) team in NBA history?

A: History is a long time. Let’s just say the worst in the past 100 years.

Q: Should Governor Patterson appoint Caroline Kennedy to fill Hillary’s NY Senate seat?

A: Yes, unless he wants to incur Nobody’s wrath all over the Internet.

Q: Was the priest right that this Playboy cover is blasphemous in that it is supposed to represent the Virgin Mary?

A: Absolutely not. There are no virgins on Playboy covers.

Q: If they call a cookie a biscuit in the UK, then what do they call a biscuit?

A: They do not have any such animal “over there.” The closest thing is a scone.

Q: What should President Obama do if Senate Republicans try to block his programs?

A: He should Trumanize them, i.e. hang them with it. Their numbers will shrink more in 2010.

Q: Can you name one good thing that Newt Gingrich has ever done?

A: As a matter of fact, yes. Just the other day he criticized the Republican National Committee for trying to tie Obama to the Illinois scandal. (But don’t ask me to name two.)

Q: What do you think of Flame, the new Burger King Whopper Cologne for men? (It’s true; I don’t make these things up – at least not this time) A: I think it is a great gift for single men who want to meat lots of hungry girls.

Q: Ex-Bruin and current Laker Jordan Farmar seeks clarity about his role on the team. Can you provide this?

A: Certainly. Play better and you will play more.<<<

A swing and a miss, and it’s strike one on our President-elect. Why on earth did he choose a bigot, Rick Warren, to give the inaugural invocation?<<<

Recently I saw a CNN headline asking what Obama can learn from Bush. I linked to the article. It was blank.<<<

On the other hand, credit where credit is due: "I didn't know what the guy said, but I saw his sole." President Bush

Now that’s funny!<<<

I want you to know that I am no Johnny-come-lately to the Obama philosophy. When I was a kid I took pennies and nickels from my brother’s bank –even then I wanted change.<<<

Any bailout of the Detroit three must have stringent conditions, because they created the problem. For too long they have made cars that too many people did not want to buy.<<<


And do the kings of finance deserve the same criticisms that are raining down on the knights of manufacturing? Absolutely! More perhaps, as theirs were sins of commission rather than of omission.<<<

Airline oxymoron – customer service.<<<

No, they shouldn’t be a team of mavericks, I’ll leave that to the late, not so great Republican ticket, but they should be another oxymoron. Ten games into their season, what my Bruins need is a modest swagger. They need to be both sure of themselves and, at the same time, humble.<<< (picture is of the Bruin freshmen five)

Question of the week – this for President-elect Barack Obama: What can your administration do to give life to the moribund Israel/Palestine peace process?<<<

Here is the first of my “Surprise, it didn’t stink” awards for 2008. It goes to “American Wife.” You would think that a novel about Laura Bush, which included some pretty hot sex scenes, would be trashy, not classy. Surprise! Classy it is.<<<

Notes to myself or, on having a new TV, Blu-ray and speaker stand with 4 remotes and the danger of a mind/body meltdown.

Step 1 – Turn on the TV with DVR control.
Step 2 - Use speaker stand remote to turn on sound in speaker stand.
Step 3 – Use Blue-ray remote urn on the DVD player, then insert DVD
Step 4 – Use TV remote to change from mode 3 to mode 1. (To do this, press insert.)
Step 5 (I hope) – Watch DVD.<<<

Nobody 747

Sunday, December 17, 2008
Nobody # 747

Nobody Asked Me But:

“It’s a bird, it’s a plane, it’s a Stealth Bomber!” As we were driving through Pasadena Sunday, I glanced up and saw, moving away from me, what looked like a huge bird. I alerted my driver, and we both decided that it could be nothing other than a B2 Stealth Bomber.

But were we crazy? There was no Rose Parade on December 7. No reason that we knew for a fly-over.

There was a reason. The Stealth was there as part of a memorial service honoring former Secretary of the Air Force, Vern Orr.

As always, it was an awesome sight, even in miniature as, it flew away.<<<

ON THE HOME

Law of physics # 747 - A mass of unwanted/unneeded items in a home, minus items discarded at various times, retains its same volume.

Or in plain English, no matter how much we throw away, we still seem to have the same amount left.<<<

And here is the Golden Rule to avoid the mass mentioned above - you should have nothing in your house that you do not know to be useful or believe to be beautiful.<<<

Make me God for a day, and I would give this gift to my wife for Christmas – the ability to go to sleep quickly and easily and sleep peacefully for the whole night.<<<

If you think my concerns about domestic spying are overheated, then how do you rationalize the listing of at least 53 innocent Americans as terrorists in a criminal intelligence database? Among those listed were two Catholic nuns, a former Democratic congressional candidate, a lifelong pacifist and a registered lobbyist.

This is not science fiction. This was an injustice that resulted from the Maryland State Police spying on groups that advocated against abortion, global warming, nuclear arms, military recruiting in high schools and bio-defense research, among other issues. Quakers and other peace groups were also targeted.

Yes, I am glad that I live in a country where this travesty was uncovered and exposed. But I wish that in my country it would never happen.<<<

As much as I hate corrupt politicians, I hate STUPID corrupt politicians like Illinois Governor Rod Blagojevich even more. And, yes, arrogance can be an aspect of stupidity. It is like he wore a “catch me, catch me” sign front and back.<<<

And isn’t it sad that the most feared word in the vocabulary of too many politicians is illumination.<<<

Book review – “The Given Day” by Dennis Lahane

Lehane, the author who wrote “Mystic River” and “Gone Baby, Gone,” has written an Irish family epic set in Boston at the time of “The Great Red Scare.” Police captain Thomas Coughlin, an immigrant from the old sod, loves his job and his country. He has no use for those who challenge it, whether they are communists, anarchists or union agitators. A cop serves, he doesn’t strike.

Coughlin’s son Danny is different. His morality centers on fairness rather than tradition. When he becomes a leader in the transition of the Boston Social club to the Boston Police Union his family pulls away from him. That he loves an Irish servant girl who has been cast out by his family, makes the break is complete.

Luther Laurence, a black man who plays baseball with speed and grace, is the other focus of “TGD.” Luther’s story moves from the diamond to a thriving black community in Oklahoma and then, on the run from a killing, to Boston where his life becomes entwined with the Coughlin’s and their evil friend.

Lehane weaves real characters into his story, Babe Ruth, Calvin Coolige, Samuel Gompers, Jack Reed and a sinister Justice Depart attorney, John Lewis.

The culminating event that brings all elements together is the Boston Police Strike in 1919.

This was a tremendous read, perhaps even making my 10 best list. I give it a 10+++<<<

The BCS got it just right this year. Florida vs. Oklahoma should be a great game. I have been touting Florida as the country’s best for several weeks, but, just as the pollsters decide to agree with me, I am climbing off the bandwagon. Oklahoma to win an epic game.<<<

What do the Celtics have that my Lakers lack? Toughness. Hunger. A killer instinct. Commitment to defense. Just plain commitment. Choose one. Heck, choose them all. The Lakers had them all for the first nine games or so, as they remembered last season’s finals loss to the Celtics. But it turns out that they have short memories, and short memories lead to bad habits – and BAD defense.<<<

Question: Who is at fault for the failure of the bailout measure for the Big Three? Was it the Republicans who killed the plan in the Senate, or the UAW who refused to agree on a timetable for a reduction of their wages and fringe benefits?

Answer: BOTH! There is no doubt in my mind that Republican Senators are trying to use the crisis to strike a blow against unions, their life-long enemy. Nor is there any doubt that the UAW is recalcitrant beyond reason. Both sides are putting self-interest above the good of the country and so, I say…

A POX ON BOTH YOUR HOUSES!<<<

Upon further review, it seems that I was wrong. The UAW has traveled their extra mile, and it is the Senate Republicans who are willing to do more great harm to the economy in order to damage their ancient enemy.

So SRs, the POX is all yours!<<<

MOVIE REVIEW “Gran Torino.”

If I were doing a one-word review, my word choice would be WONDERFUL! But since I will write more than one but fewer than many, let me begin with the small quibbles. Some of the secondary acting is a little amateurish, and the climax is a bit over the top. But “Gran Torino” will make you laugh a lot until it is time for you to cry. What more can one ask of a movie? Not a great film, but wonderful! Or, as Kenneth Turan writes in closing his review, “anywhere Eastwood is, movie audiences are wise to follow.”<<<

With all the bailout jobs coming out of DC, one would hope that Congress would have the guts to try the impossible and rescue the Detroit Lions.<<<

And, finally, WOW (Women on the Web) just named their 50 sexiest men over 50 and left me off the list.

Go figure!<<<

Nobody 746

Sunday, December 7, 2008
Nobody # 746

Nobody Asked Me But:

Michelle Rhee is the chancellor for D.C. Public Schools. She believes that better teachers equal better schools, and the way to get better teachers is to pay for high quality and get rid of low. (By terminating them - but not in the drastic Terminator way.) As a beginning, she has proposed a two-tiered salary schedule. Teachers who surrender their tenure rights can earn, through merit, up to $135,000 per year. Those who don’t stay on the present schedule and max out at about $80,000.

Her MAJOR opponent, of course, is the union, which, as always, clings to tenure and the unified, lock-stepped, seniority based salary schedule as if these two were the only walls separating its members from the horrors of hell, better known as arbitrary and unfair administrators. This is about 25% truth and 75% diversion to allow unions to protect their relevancy, which is fast disappearing. Yes, too many administrators are arbitrary and unfair, but they can be removed along with, or preferably before, “bad” teachers.

If President-elect Obama holds true to his campaign ideals, he is going to have to take sides in this key battle over the correct direction for public education. Which side? I say the middle with a strong lean towards Rhee. Here are my recommendations:

1. Get rid of superfluous and incompetent administrators, and those who are both superfluous and incompetent go first.

2. Make it easier, but not easy, to fire teachers.

3. Require transparency in all actions, including personnel – especially in evaluations. No more closed doors.<<<

This brings us to our question of the week, this for President-elect Obama: Given that the Federal government has a limited role in public education, what can and will you do to make our schools child-centered rather than administrator-and-union-centered?<<<

News item: Esteban Nuñez, the son of former California Assembly Speaker Fabian Nuñez, and three other men who were arrested in the fatal stabbing of a college student in San Diego.

Here is the reaction of Los Angeles Mayor Antonio Villaraigosa, a longtime friend of the Nuñez family: "I've known him since he was a little boy. He's a great kid, a good boy.”

Sure he stabs people occasionally, but he has a good heart.<<<

I don’t know about you, but I would feel a lot better about all the war-advocating Neos, if they were on the front line being shot at rather than holed up at a think tank or the offices of some “right” magazine wondering where to go for lunch.<<<

The terrorist attack in Mumbai reminded me once again of the horrors that religion gone bad has imposed on humanity. If Lady Justice weighed the good that religion has done for humankind against the evil, her scale would be so unbalanced towards the latter that she would fall.<<<

And if there was a God, wouldn’t all holiday shoppers be courteous?<<<

As most of you know, Dennis Lehane is the author of “Mystic River,” a great novel that Clint Eastwood made into a great movie and “Gone, Baby, Gone” a very, very good mystery novel also turned into an excellent film. I am reading his newest book, “The Given Day,” a historical novel about the Great Red Scare, as it occurred in Boston after World War I.

From the book:

Did you know, I didn’t, about Greenwood, Oklahoma. It was a black community in Tulsa that was established after the oil boom there. It was middle class, affluent, and its interaction with the rest of Tulsa was a model for peaceful race relations - until hard times turned the lower class whites against them. If you don’t know the rest, I am sure you can guess – a race riot and a massacre of blacks so savage that it sounds like something out of third-world Africa.

No laughing matter. Did you know that American communists were politically opposed to laughter? I didn’t. They saw it as a sentimental disease and, like religion, an opiate to the masses imposed on them by their oppressors. Now that’s funny – in a tragic sort of way.

As you can see, a library could be filled ten thousand times over with the things that I don’t know.

But that just gives me lots to learn.<<<

And speaking of learning, did you read that California is the only state that passes the college affordability test? And then barely, and only because of their vast JC system. What a national disgrace.<<<

Major League baseball owners are so concerned about the current recession that they are meeting next week at the Bellagio in Las Vegas to figure out how best to cut expenses.<<<

Here is a blood-lust political genealogy:

Joe McCarthy begat Richard Nixon who begat Lee Atwater who begat Karl Rove and Rush Limbaugh and Sean Hannity and Bill O’Reilly and Sarah (finally they had a woman) Palin.<<<

ETHICS AND I

Q: I restore pianos. The owner of an empty house gave me a damaged Steinway that had been abandoned. I spent many hours and a lot of money ($2,000) restoring it. A few days ago a woman came to my store in tears with proof that the piano was hers, given away while she was in the hospital. What is my ethical responsibility?

A: Since it is hers, you should give it back. What you lose in dollars you gain back in sense, as in a sense of personal satisfaction.<<<

And continuing on with Harvard’s 2008 Ig Nobel Prize Winners:

ECONOMICS PRIZE. Geoffrey Miller, Joshua Tybur and Brent Jordan of the University of New Mexico, USA, for discovering that professional lap dancers earn higher tips when they are ovulating.

MEDICINE PRIZE. Dan Ariely of Duke University (USA), Rebecca L. Waber of MIT (USA), Baba Shiv of Stanford University (USA), and Ziv Carmon of INSEAD (Singapore) for demonstrating that high-priced fake medicine is more effective than low-priced fake medicine.