Nobody 691a - Movie Tournament

MOVIE FINAL SCENES

ROUND ONE
King Kong falls from Empire State Building – winner, easy
Debra Winger dies of cancer in Terms of Endearment

Bonnie and Clyde riddled with bullets – winner, easy
Walken loses Russian roulette in The Deer Hunter

Titanic sinks and DiCaprio drowns
Bambi’s mom shot by hunters – winner, simple sad wins over incredible sinking ship. Both stand out in memory

Alec Guinness blows up The Bridge Over the River Kwai
Susan Hayward gets the chair in I Want To Live! - winner, but close. I was younger and a woman on death row stands out

Nazis melt in Raiders of the Lost Ark
Dirty cop suffocates in corn silo in Witness – winner – although I loved Raiders, Danny Glover’s suffocation seemed more real, scary and satisfying

Scarface goes out with a bang
Wicked Witch melts – winner – another all-time classic easily beats out Pacino’s over-the-top end.

Alan Rickman’s skyscraper plunge in Die Hard
Cagney goes up in flames in White Heat – winner, classic over modern

Wallace Shawn’s wine poisoning in The Princess Bride - winner, simple but poetic
Robocop criminal gets toxic waste bath

David Warner’s decapitation in The Omen
John Hurt’s bursting stomach in Alien – winner, an all-time horror image

Telekinetic Carrie sends knives into her mom – winner, I remember it but not Travolta
Travolta shoots backseat passenger in Pulp Fiction

Airbag accidentally deploys, killing Final Destination girl
Mr. Big expands and pops in Live and Let Die - winner, Bond stands out

Psycho shower scene – winner, great competition but still wins easily
Shark attack on female swimmer in Jaws opener

Sonny Corleone gunned down at tollbooth – winner, all those bullets beats out light saber duel
Darth Vader strikes down Obi-Wan Kenobi

Dr. Strangelove’s Slim Pickens rides nuclear bomb – winner, great black comedy, great black ending,
Babes chase sexist off cliff in Python’s Meaning of Life

Willem Dafoe’s fatal battlefield collapse in Platoon
Tom Hanks shot on bridge in Saving Private Ryan – winner, I liked both the movie and the character more

Thelma and Louise drive car off edge of Grand Canyon – winner, a gladiator can't beat two chicks driving into the Grand Canyon
Russell Crowe’s death match in Roman coliseum

ROUND TWO THE SWEET SIXTEEN
King Kong falls from Empire State Building – winner, two classics, but this one has more movie history connected
Bonnie and Clyde riddled with bullets

Bambi’s mom shot by hunters – winner, sad, undeserving animal death over murderer
Susan Hayward gets the chair in I Want To Live!

Dirty cop suffocates in corn silo in Witness
Wicked Witch melts – winner – fairly tough choice but “I’m melting” stands out.

Cagney goes up in flames in White Heat – winner in early classic
Wallace Shawn’s wine poisoning in The Princess Bride

John Hurt’s bursting stomach in Alien – winner, one of the ultimate movie moments of horror
Telekinetic Carrie sends knives into her mom

Mr. Big expands and pops in Live and Let Die
Psycho shower scene – winner, I still refuse to take a shower unless I’m glassed in.

Sonny Corleone gunned down at tollbooth
Dr. Strangelove’s Slim Pickens rides nuclear bomb – winner, unthinking patriotism is a blast

Tom Hanks shot on bridge in Saving Private Ryan – sad beats spectacular
Thelma and Louise drive car off

ROUND THREE, THE ELITE 8
King Kong falls from Empire State Building – winner, this time spectacular beats sad
Bambi’s mom shot by hunters

Dirty cop suffocates in corn silo in Witness – winner, close, but I still can’t forget Glover drowning in grain
Cagney goes up in flames in White Heat

John Hurt’s bursting stomach in Alien
Psycho shower scene – winner, two all-time greats, but real beats fantasy

Dr. Strangelove’s Slim Pickens rides nuclear bomb – winner, ride that A-bomb, cowboy
Tom Hanks shot on bridge in Saving Private Ryan

FINAL FOUR
King Kong falls from Empire State Building – winner, easy, Witness got some lucky draws to get this far
Dirty cop suffocates in corn silo in Witness

Psycho shower scene – winner, gore over war
Dr. Strangelove’s Slim Pickens

CHAMPIONSHIP
King Kong falls from Empire State Building
Psycho shower scene

Two worthy opponents battle it out in a close contest, but I still can’t take a shower with only a curtain. So the winner is:

Nobody 691

Sunday, March 25, 2007
Nobody # 691

Nobody Asked Me But:

The news that cancer has resumed its assault on the body of Elizabeth Edwards both saddens and depresses me. Yes, I care about a stranger and about my own mortality as well. Under the circumstances, should Edwards continue his campaign for president? That’s not my business. It is a private decision between the two of them. In the same circumstances, I wouldn’t, but it will not cause me to hesitate to vote for him should he become my favorite.

What it isn’t is a woman issue as Rachel Singer, 53, a writer who lives in Brooklyn tries to make it — “another woman oppressed by male expectation and ambition.”

To me this is nonsense - the kind of knee-jerk reaction that hurts the real issues in the American’s women’s fight for equality.<<<

I don’t know whether any of you had time to try the example of Bracketology that I included last week. I hope so, as I find them fun, interesting and revealing. Doing one is a painless way to clarify your thinking on subjects both important and mundane.

(aside) The Bracketology book is hot and was reviewed (favorably) in the current Newsweek.

This week I am going to do things differently. I will include the opening round contests and leave it for you to fill in your brackets without first seeing my choices. The subject of today’s tournament is memorable final scenes from movies. Take it from the opening 32, chose a winner in each contest and you will have cut it o a Sweet 16. Do the same for the 16 and you cut the list to an Elite 8, then a Final Four and finally you are left with two from which to choose your national champion, i.e. – most important of the original 32.

If you decide to try, let me know how yours turns out.

To show you what I mean, here are the first 2 matches in round one last week:

Berlin Wall comes tumbling down (1989) x
Apollo I disaster: Grissom, White, Chaffee die (1967)

First time you heard the Beatles (1963)
Nixon resigns over Watergate (1974) x

As you can see by the x’s, I chose Berlin Wall over Apollo disaster and Nixon over the Beatles.

So in my second round I would have to choose between the Berlin Wall and Nixon.

I know it is much easier with a normal horizontal bracket arrangement but, since I cannot reproduce one here, it has to be vertical.

And away we go:

MOVIE FINAL SCENES ROUND ONE

King Kong falls from Empire State Building
Debra Winger dies of cancer in Terms of Endearment

Bonnie and Clyde riddled with bullets
Walken loses Russian roulette in The Deer Hunter

Titanic sinks and DiCaprio drowns
Bambi’s mom shot by hunters

Alec Guinness blows up The Bridge Over the River Kwai
Susan Hayward gets the chair in I Want To Live!

Nazis melt in Raiders of the Lost Ark
Dirty cop suffocates in corn silo in Witness

Scarface goes out with a bang
Wicked Witch melts

Alan Rickman’s skyscraper plunge in Die Hard
Cagney goes up in flames in White Heat

Wallace Shawn’s wine poisoning in The Princess Bride
Robocop criminal gets toxic waste bath

David Warner’s decapitation in The Omen
John Hurt’s bursting stomach in Alien

Telekinetic Carrie sends knives into her mom
Travolta shoots backseat passenger in Pulp Fiction

Airbag accidentally deploys, killing Final Destination girl
Mr. Big expands and pops in Live and Let Die

Psycho shower scene
Shark attack on female swimmer in Jaws opener

Sonny Corleone gunned down at tollbooth
Darth Vader strikes down Obi-Wan Kenobi

Dr. Strangelove’s Slim Pickens rides nuclear bomb
Babes chase sexist off cliff in Python’s Meaning of Life

Willem Dafoe’s fatal battlefield collapse in Platoon
Tom Hanks shot on bridge in Saving Private Ryan

Thelma and Louise drive car off edge of Grand Canyon
Russell Crowe’s death match in Roman coliseum<<<

I want to write a little about my reasons for the choices I made in last week’s bracketology tournament. The criterion I used in each contest was which of the two had the greater long-term effect on America and the world.

With this in mind, a boxing match went to my Elite 8 - farther than you might think - but I feel that Cassius Marcellus Clay, Jr., AKA Muhammad Ali, had a huge impact on race relations in the United States. If Joe Louis allowed white Americans to admire and respect a black man, Ali demanded it and made it commonplace.

One of my hardest choices was in the Elite 8 when I picked the first man on the moon over the Munich terrorists. I did so because, although the Olympic attack was a tragic and very important milestone on the way to our terrorist world of today, the moonwalk somehow symbolized the human ability to turn dream into hope.

On the other hand, my two finalists show the darkness that continues, too often, to win out over hope.<<<

John Prine is almost certainly the best little-known singer/song writer of the past 35 years. The other day, while I was musing about my recently declining interest in reading, thinking and writing about politics, a line from one of his great songs, “Hello In There,” came to mind:

“And all the news just repeats itself
Like some forgotten dream that we've both seen.”

And then I saw these two cartoons and another line from the same song played in my head:

“We lost Davy in the Korean war,
And I still don't know what for,”

Declining interest in politics? Yes! Brain dead to them? No! So ladies and gentlemen place your bets. As of this week in the 2008 race for the presidency to win $100 you would need to bet the following: (source - Slate)

Hillary Clinton - $24.30
Rudy Giuliani - $21.60
Barack Obama - $18.00 J
ohn McCain - $13.50
Mitt Romney - $7.80
Al Gore - $7.10
John Edwards - $6.50
George Allen - $0.50
Mark Warner - $0.50<<<

When you reach a certain age, beware of reading the health section of your local newspaper, because for every disease, old and new, you will be able to identify symptoms working on or in your body. So imagine my pleasure in discovering one for which I am symptom-free. I do not have orthorexia – which is – “a clinical fixation on righteous eating.”<<<

From the San Jose Mercury News: “Christian teens face off with Bay Area progressives.”

The teens came to talk of Christian values such as love thy neighbor shown clearly in the statement of Eden West, a 16-year-old Christian: referring to a man holding a sign proclaiming he was both gay and Christian, West said, "If he really loved God, he wouldn't be gay."<<<

THE SPORTS PAGE

Clint Amberry, the star forward for Los Alamitos (MN) High School, stepped to the line in a recent play-off game with only a few seconds left and his team trailing 48-47. He missed the front end of his 1 and 1. Game over. So what so unusual about this?

Amberry’s grandfather, Tom Amberry, holds the world record for the most consecutive free throws at 2,750.<<<

I am sorry but there will be no Nobody next Sunday. IT JUST SO HAPPENS THAT BARB AND I WILL BE IN ATLANTA. What a season! What a game! The Brusin’ Bruins."

I love the postgame quote from Seth Davis of Sports Illustrated:

“Isn’t it a strange coincidence that so many teams seem to have poor shooting games when they play the Bruins.”

From the Sacramento Bee: “These Bruins are built to inflict pain, designed to leave opponents staring into the mirror afterward at an assortment of bumps and bruises, feeling as if they had been in a prizefight instead of simply fighting for the prize trip to the Final Four.”

“They cause opponents to hesitate around the basket, to become intent on avoiding the hit, leading to an inordinate number of missed layups and close-in shots. There are no freebies coming out of Westwood anymore.”

From Lorenzo Mata while wearing the basketball net that the Bruins cut down in San Jose: “I’ll take this over gold, platinum, any jewelry. I’ll take it over anything.”

And finally, this headline that says it all- from the Lawrence (Kansas) Journal-World: "(B)ruined!"

Nobody 690

Sunday, March 18, 2007
Nobody # 690

Nobody Asked Me But:

Let’s start today with a sing-along:

Crazy Ann Coulter had a dream, E-I-E-I-O
And in her dream she saw some faggots, E-I-E-I-O
With a “Hillary faggot " here and a "Bill faggot" there
Here an "Al" there a "John"
Everywhere a "faggot," faggot
Crazy Ann Coulter had a dream, E-I-E-I-O

Repeat, substituting General Peter Pace for Crazy Ann.<<<

From this week’s Newsweek: Do you believe that the theory of evolution can coexist with religion?

Yes x No

Not Sure

A person (although not I) could believe in God as the first cause that set evolution in motion.<<<

Hugh coming through – with a response to last week’s questions:

"I hope I get this right. My father was a small businessman. Mom gave piano lessons and was a church musician. Grandmother (maternal) was a homemaker and my grandfather worked for a bakery. My paternal grandparents were farmers."

"I do not remember my first words but I do remember my mothers reaction. It was something like "bring the soap!"<<<

Last Sunday was one of those days when California resembles paradise. We used the first day of daylight savings well. It was 80+ degrees, so we sat out until after 7. We also did the same earlier, legs in the sun, body in the shade, a really excellent book and the smell of orange blossoms.

The book was Rennie Airth’s second, “The Blood-Dimmed Tide.” His first, “River Of Darkness,” took place in Post WWI England. “Tide,” is set 11 year’s later. The dark shadow of Nazism is just starting to set off alarm bells on the continent and, more slowly, in England. John Madden has now retired from Scotland Yard but finds himself being drawn to the case of a serial destroyer of pre-fourteen-year-old girls when he discovers the latest victim. Airth is an excellent writer, and he tells a superb story. I’m a tough grader and I gave it an A+.<<<

This week in Slate Magazine - http://www.slate.com/id/2161655/nav/tap1/ is a very interesting excerpt from the introduction to “The Enlightened Bracketologist: The Final Four of Everything,” which uses NCAA Tournament brackets to answer life’s nagging questions. I have taken the question, which was more important and followed through round by round with my opinions. In each round my more important is marked with an X as we move from 32 down to number 1. The form I use below is way not cool compared to doing it at the link above, but is the best I can do here.

It’s fun! Try it! You’ll like it!

ROUND ONE
Berlin Wall comes tumbling down (1989) x
Apollo I disaster: Grissom, White, Chaffee die (1967)

First time you heard the Beatles (1963)
Nixon resigns over Watergate (1974) x

Mount St. Helens erupts (1980)
Katrina hits New Orleans (2005) x

O.J. verdict (1995)
First Clay-Liston fight (1964) x

Miracle on Ice (1980)
Oklahoma City bombing (1995) x

JFK assassinated (1963) x
John Glenn orbits Earth (1962)

John Lennon shot (1980) x
Elvis Presley dies at 42 (1977)

RFK assassinated (1968)
Kent State shootings (1970) x

Woodstock festival (1969) x
San Francisco World Series earthquake (1989)

Buddy Holly dies (1959)
First man on the moon (1969) x

Princess Diana dies (1997)
Three Mile Island nuclear accident (1979) x

Munich Olympics terrorist attack (1972) x
Reagan shot (1981)

Shuttle Challenger explodes (1986)
Martin Luther King assassinated (1968) x

JFK Jr. dies in plane crash (1999)
Shuttle Columbia disintegrates on re-entry (2003) x

9/11 attacks (2001) x
Asian tsunami (2004)

Dale Earnhardt dies at Daytona (2001)
Russians launch Sputnik (1957) x

ROUND TWO – THE SIXTEEN
Berlin Wall comes tumbling down (1989) x
Nixon resigns over Watergate (1974)

Katrina hits New Orleans (2005)
First Clay-Liston fight (1964) x

Oklahoma City bombing (1995)
JFK assassinated (1963) x

John Lennon shot (1980)
Kent State shootings (1970) x

Woodstock festival (1969)
First man on the moon (1969) x

Three Mile Island nuclear accident (1979)
Munich Olympics terrorist attack (1972) x

Martin Luther King assassinated (1968) x
Shuttle Columbia disintegrates on re-entry (2003)

9/11 attacks (2001) x
Russians launch Sputnik (1957)

ROUND THREE – ELITE 8
Berlin Wall comes tumbling down (1989) x
First Clay-Liston fight (1964)

JFK assassinated (1963) x
Kent State shootings (1970)

First man on the moon (1969) x
Munich Olympics terrorist attack (1972)

Martin Luther King assassinated (1968)
9/11 attacks (2001) x

FINAL FOUR
Berlin Wall comes tumbling down (1989)
JFK assassinated (1963) x

First man on the moon (1969)
9/11 attacks (2001) x

MOST IMPORTANT
JFK assassinated (1963)
9/11 attacks (2001) XXX<<<

“You're Invited to a Comprehensive Obesity Seminar - LA Times.” I hope that I was not the only one to whom they sent this E-mail.<<<

He has started an unnecessary and disastrous war, which he will leave as his main but not only negative legacy for his successor. He will be remembered also for his attack on the Bill of Rights, his reverse Robin Hood tax policies (rob the poor to help the rich), his ineffectiveness in handling the disasters of Katrina and Walter Reed, his huge national debt, his failure to make more than a token effort to find a fuel alternative that will free America from its dependency on the Middle Peace and his callous indifference to the environment. His is a government of secrecy within a democracy that requires transparency to function properly. So, Is George Bush the worst President of all time?

A significant number of historians think so. They compare him with the other great failures, see list immediately below, and do not find him wanting. They use several criteria, but in my opinion the overriding one is that each man left office with his country much worse off than it was when he first took his oath. Here, then, are the five with whom these historians group Bush. The sixth one is my addition to the Hall Of Shame.

James Buchanan, - mishandled Southern secession in 1860 to the point that his most recent biographer has said, probably amounted to disloyalty.

Andrew Johnson, - actively sided with former Confederates and undermined Reconstruction.

Warren G. Harding, - administration was fabulously corrupt.

Herbert Hoover, - tried some reforms but remained imprisoned in his own outmoded individualist ethic and collapsed under the weight of the stock-market crash of 1929.

Richard M. Nixon, - the only American president forced to resign from office.

(My addition) Jimmy Carter – he lusted in his heart… no, that’s not it. He left the country in a malaise that he helped create.

Does George Bush belong on this list? Look around you and tell me that the answer is not a resounding yes! Is he the worst? That’s pretty subjective. That he belongs with this group is damning enough.<<<

“He who does not hope to win has already lost.” Jose Joaquin Olmedo – poet and President of Ecuador, June to December 1845.

This excellent quotation about life also applies to college basketball in March when that sport is life.

The Bruins hoped to win yesterday and they did, defeating Indiana and advancing to a Sweet 16 meeting next Thursday with Pittsburg. But it wasn’t easy. With so many missed shots and the fact that it was played on St. Paddy’s Day, one could easily have applied that old Irish saying:

"Drink is the curse of the land. It makes you fight with your neighbor. It makes you shoot at your landlord-- and it makes you miss him."

But, two more tough wins and Atlanta here come the Turners.<<<

And, finally, congratulations to Arron Affalo for being named first-team all-American by the Sporting News, the fifth time he's been named to a first team this postseason. Afflalo was also named to the NABC, ESPN.com, Dick Vitale and SI.com teams.

And to sophomore point guard Darren Collison, who was named second-team all-American by SI.com.<<<

Nobody 689

Sunday, March 11, 2007
Nobody # 689

Nobody Asked Me But:

I find most people hate to be informed. People need to be amused, shocked or angered. Jim Murray

So to all of you who do not read Nobody religiously, may you burn in Blythe.<<<

Here’s Hugh’s answer to my vacation question last week:

Hawaii is not at the top of the list but it is ON the list. I would want to go to the British Isles and go on the Open Championship tour. Very expensive. However you get to play a number of the "links" that are in the Championship Series. When I am not "hacking" around the links I would be taking in the beautiful history that is all around me.

It sounds like your perfect vacation. May you do it someday and beat your handicap at St. Andrews.<<<.<<<

From this week’s Newsweek – Conventional Wisdom department.

Thomas Jefferson gets an up arrow because: “Genealogists say 3rd prez may have had Jewish ancestors. Which would explain pastrami stain on Dec. of Ind.”

Answer of the week (again from the Book Of Answers): PRESS FOR CLOSURE. Do any of you have an appropriate question to go with this? Here’s mine:

I am 72 and my door remains always open to another malt, another taco, a great new pizza. What should I do?<<<

One of my biggest life mistakes was to ask several Christmases ago for a book on Shakespeare by Yale professor Harold Bloom. I found him to be a pompous ass and didn’t finish the book. What is that saying: Old pompous asses never change, they just crawl in their hole? (I made that up, but it fits) Bloom proved it with his comment, also in this week’s Newsweek.

Asked about the two books he cared most about sharing with his kids he went beyond his answer to take a hack at Harry:

“The two Alice books by Lewis Carroll are the finest literary fantasies ever written. They will last forever, and the Harry Potter books are going to wind up in the rubbish bin. The first six volumes have sold, I am told, 350 million copies. I know of no larger indictment of the world's descent into subliteracy.”

The July arrival of “Harry Potter and The Deathly Hallows” is eagerly awaited by grandchildren and by Grandpa Jim as well. I have preordered my copy, and it is easily the book that I am most anxious to read in 2007. So take that Harold Bloom and a pox on your pomposity!<<<

A Bloom add-on that proves my point:

Newsweek also asked him to name an important book that he admits he has never read.

Answer: :I cannot think of a major work I have not ingested.”

Jt - You read them, pompous fool, you don’t ingest them.<<<

A pro-modernization Arab writes in the NY Times:

“When religion has control over science — you can be sure that you are in an Arab country.”

(or in Kansas) jt<<<

Cartoon of the week: (left)

Here are the answers to last week’s SAT quiz questions:

What did Tom, Tom the piper’s son steal? A pig – and he got a beating for it while the pig was converted to pork chops.

How old was pease-porridge in the pot? Nine days.

What was the cat playing when the cow jumped over the moon? A fiddle – which he kept right on playing while the dish ran away with the spoon.

What was Wee Willie Winkle wearing when he ran through the town? His nightgown – which was all right coming down butt provided quite a view when he ran up stairs.

Whom did Simple Simon meet while going to the fair? A pie man, of course. Poor Simon. What a time to be broke.<<<

A question for me (and you): What did your parents, grandparents and great grandparents do for a living?

My mother was a bookkeeper. My father worked in a General Motors factory. My stepfather worked in the missile program in New Mexico. My grandparents were farmers in Michigan. My step-grandfather was a small-town doctor. I don’t know about my great grandparents but I assume that they were farmers.<<<

Question # 2: As a baby, what were your first words?

There is a debate in my family. Some claim I said Bruins, others say Fosselman’s.

So how would you answer either or both of these questions?<<<

A thought on the large number of evangelists who fall prey to “demon sex:” Maybe the attraction is less about being born again and more about the birds and the bees that start the process.<<<

We often evaluate new Supreme Court Justices relative to the potential impact of their votes. But sometimes this impact has more to do with how they influence their fellow Justices. For example, perhaps the most important way that the appointment of Justice Clarence Thomas effected the court was not in his lock-step vote for the conservative wing but in the way that his extreme positions and his accompanying opinions moved Justice O’Conner from right-center to center. (From the book, “Supreme Conflict” by Jan Greenburg)<<<

In the book I am listening to, a character refers to a bad dream which he states to be fairly common – one in which the dreamer is forced to take an exam in a class for which he is registered but stopped attending. That one invades my sleep on a fairly regular basis - and I thought I was the only one.<<<

From CNN on line: “Should parents lose custody of their children for overfeeding them?”

Yes x
No

Obviously my vote does not suggest child abuse for an extra malt here and there but for parents who feed their kids into gross caricatures of what youth should be. In such a case I would recommend remedial intervention first and custody loss if intervention fails. Parenthood is not a license to destroy.<<<

In anticipation of a close contest for Inane Quote Of 2007, I have selected this as the Quote Of the Quarter.

When Jim Lehrer asked President Bush why, if the war on terrorism was so overwhelmingly important, he had never asked more Americans “to sacrifice something,” Mr. Bush answered:

“Well, you know, I think a lot of people are in this fight. I mean, they sacrifice peace of mind when they see the terrible images of violence on TV every night.”

He may be inane, lame and clueless but he’s all ours.<<<

To those of you who read Nobody and love politics - “forgive me for I have sinned.” I didn’t vote in the school board election Tuesday. I had applied for automatic absentee ballots for Barb and myself about 6-8 weeks ago, but they never came. I still could have gone to the polls but I didn’t. The election was to decide between a board controlled by the mayor or by the teacher’s union. Since I want neither, I don’t feel terrible about the whole thing.<<<

Coach John Wooden, a man of marvelous talents, has another that may be known less well. He can see the future. He wrote the poem below to a friend as he and the team traveled home from a trip to the Pacific Northwest in 1963:

However…. There’s optimism
Beneath my valid criticism.
I want to say – yes, I’ll foretell,
Eventually this team will jell.
And when they do they will be great,
A championship could be their fate.
With every starter coming back,
Yes Walt and Gail and Keith and Jack
And Fred and Freddie and some more
We will be champs in sixty-four.

The sixty-four team went undefeated and won Wooden’s first National Championship.<<<

Since I have nothing good to write about the Bruins today, let me tell you a story about the better times of two weeks ago. Coach Wooden, along with Kareem was signing books in the student union before the Stanford game. Barb endured the long line and, as always, gave Coach several of the See’s suckers he loves so much. After the game, we stopped at the Valley Inn for fried chicken. Coach was there with his family and, as he left, gave one of the suckers to his waitress. I guess Barb over-supplied him.<<<

Scandal of the week: Billy Packer, CBS’s number one college basketball announcer is having an affair…………………..with his mirror.

Or as Bones McKinney, Packer’s long ago coach at Wake Forest, once said:

"I never wanted Billy to inbound the ball because he only wanted to throw it to himself."<<<

On to Atlanta!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Nobody 688 - Footnotes

Footnotes for Nobody 688
March 4, 2007

BASKETBALL

From Greg Hansen – Arizona Daily Star:

While dispatching my annual All-Pac-10 media ballot to a Bay Area newspaper on Tuesday, I had to count and recount my preliminary list of 10 all-star players. Six are freshman and sophs. Only one, Oregon point guard Aaron Brooks, is a senior.

That is unprecedented.

Although my list may differ from others participating in the media poll, I do not think there will be that much overall difference. Here's my list, based entirely on Pac-10 games.
Seniors (1) – Brooks.

Juniors (3) – Arron Afflalo, UCLA; Nick Young, USC; Derrick Low, Washington State.

Sophomores (4) – Darren Collison, UCLA; Lawrence Hill, Stanford; Jon Brockman, Washington; Jeff Pendergraph, Arizona State.

Freshmen (2) – Brook Lopez, Stanford; Chase Budinger, Arizona.

If the league season lasted another month, Stanford's 7-foot Lopez might emerge as the most powerful player in the West.

Those on the waiting list are not seniors either. You could replace Budinger with sophomore teammate Marcus Williams, drop Brockman and insert his freshman teammate Spencer Hawes.

I think Hansen has made excellent choices. I would make only two changes: (1) Replace Derrick Low with teammate Kyle Weaver. (2) Replace Budinger with Oregon State’s Marcel Jones.

Also from Hansen:

After Brooks, the league's next-best seniors are USC's Lodrick Stewart, who is the No. 3 option for the Trojans, Cal point guard Ayinde Ubaka and Arizona's Mustafa Shakur and Ivan Radenovic.

It is the least-skilled senior class in Pac-10 history, 1979-current.<<<

MUSIC

Love Somebody

Doris Day and Buddy Clark
Written by Joan Whitney and Alex Kramer

Peaked at # 1 in 1948

DORIS: Love somebody, yes, I do
Love somebody, yes, I do
Love somebody, yes, I do
I love somebody but I won't say who

Handsome face, six feet tall and his picture's on my wall
Love to be his baby doll
If he kissed me I

wouldn't mind at all

BUDDY: I love somebody, yes, I do
Love somebody, yes, I do
Love somebody, yes, I do
Love somebody but I won't say who

Don't know why she acts so shy, she oughta know I wouldn't dream of even hurtin' a
fly
Hope she doesn't pass me by 'cause if she did I'd die, I know I'd die

BOTH: I love somebody, yes, I do
Love somebody, yes, I do
BUDDY: Love somebody, yes, I do
BOTH: Love somebody but I won't say who

DORIS: He's big and strong
BUDDY Wouldja like to feel my muscle?
BRDORIS: Bold and gay
BRBUDDY: I never once lost a tussle
BRDORIS: At the moment he's not very far away
BRBUDDY: Why don'tcha say who's "they" already?
BRDORIS: I'd want to marry him today
BRBUDDY: But you don't say who
BRDORIS: That I cannot do
BRBUDDY: Happen to be me?
BRDORIS: Possibility
BR
BRBUDDY Won'tcha tell me who ya love?
BRDORIS: Love somebody
BRBUDDY: Tell me true
BRDORIS: Yes, I do
BRBUDDY: Yes, you do
BRDORIS: Love somebody
BRBUDDY: I do, too
BRDORIS: And I do
BRBUDDY: Maybe me
BRDORIS: Love somebody
BRBUDDY: I hope it's me
BRBOTH: Love somebody but I won't *say* who
BR
BR
BRBUDDY: C'mon confess
BRDORIS: Why don'tcha try and guess?
BRBOTH: Do tell. Let's tell.
BRDORIS: You promise not to breathe a word?
BRBUDDY: Doris, don't be absurd
BRDORIS: Strictly entre-nous?
BRBUDDY: Oui, oui!! We two
BRDORIS: Well
BRBUDDY: Confidentially
BRDORIS: Between you and me
BRBOTH: Confidentially
BRDORIS: I love somebody
BRBUDDY: I've got news for you
BRDORIS: Love somebody
BRBUDDY: I feel that way, too
BRDORIS: Love somebody
BRBUDDY: Glad it's true
BRBOTH: That somebody that I love is you

DON’T FENCE ME IN

Oh, give me land, lots of land under starry skies above,
Don't fence me in.
Let me ride through the wide open country that I love,
Don't fence me in.
Let me be by myself in the evenin' breeze,
And listen to the murmur of the cottonwood trees,
Send me off forever but I ask you please,
Don't fence me in.

Just turn me loose, let me straddle my old saddle
Underneath the western skies.
On my Cayuse, let me wander over yonder
Till I see the mountains rise.

I want to ride to the ridge where the west commences
And gaze at the moon till I lose my senses
And I can't look at hovels and I can't stand fences
Don't fence me in.

Nobody 688

Sunday, March 4, 2007
Nobody # 688

Nobody Asked Me But:

Question of the week:

If you had only one more vacation (never mind the reason – no health crisis, impending death or anything like that) and you couldn’t go to Hawaii, where would you go?

That is a tough one for me in that I love so many places that we have visited. Large cities come to mind – San Francisco and Seattle. Smaller ones too – Saratoga Springs and Carmel. States also – Maine and Vermont. And let’s not forget England and Scotland.

But after careful consideration and with no little pain for those places that didn’t make the final cut, my choice would be Cape Cod –in a summer warm, but not hot, the ice cream shops open late and the usual crowds having decided to vacation elsewhere that year.

Where would you go?<<<

“We don’t solve our problems, we just get tired of them.” – anonymous

This quote is pertinent to many things. At or near the top is education.

From Hugh – February 24: “Only three days this week at the salt mine as I have a two day workshop on Wednesday and Thursday that I am sure will make me a much better teacher!”

My reply – sarcasm intended: “Workshops usually do. You come out a changed person with new “solutions” to old problems. New “solutions” are like streetcars, miss one and another will be along soon. But they all take you to the same place.”

To get to a different place we must first skip the “To School” trolley and catch the one that says “To Home.” In his NY Times column last Thursday, David Brooks gave some real meaning to this “say often, do seldom, if ever” message by defining the problem and pointing out solutions that are at least small beginnings toward solution.

Brooks: “All the presidential candidates this year will talk about education. The conventional ones will talk about improving the schools. The creative ones will talk about improving the lives of students.”

He goes on to point out that despite the good and the rotten in our schools, student success is mostly about what happens at home. A dysfunctional home environment, one in which the parent is too busy, or too unknowing to nurture learning, is going to send a very high percentage of low achievers or failures to school.

Brooks continues: “The question, of course, is, what can government do about any of this? The answer is that there are programs that do work to help young and stressed mothers establish healthier attachments. These programs usually involve having nurses or mature women make a series of home visits to give young mothers the sort of cajoling and practical wisdom that in other times would have been delivered by grandmothers or elders.”

“The Circle of Security program has measurably improved attachments and enhanced social skills. The Nurse-Family Partnerships program, founded by David Olds, has produced rigorously examined, impressive results. Children who have been in this program had 59 percent fewer arrests by age 15. (Presidential candidates are commanded to read Katherine Boo’s Feb. 6, 2006, New Yorker article to get a feel for how these programs work.)”

This is only a beginning, but it was good to be reminded that government can play an important part in helping to solve one of America’s greatest problems.<<<

The problem is potentially serious. Too many missing bees, up to 70% in some places, could drastically mess up the agricultural food chain. But I still have to laugh at the human compulsion to label every deviation from the norm as some kind of syndrome. This one they are calling, “colony collapse disorder.”<<<

I know I have brought this up before but its frequency is driving me crazy and nobody will give me an answer. When did somebody up there, down there or over there change the grammatical law of fewer and less?

Take this sentence from the bee article: “There are less (fewer) beekeepers, less (fewer) bees, yet more crops to pollinate.”

The law, as I learned it, says fewer for numbers, less for amounts. Either someone should prove to me that the law has been repealed or it is time to Mirandize all these grammatical criminals.

Or maybe it is I. Perhaps I suffer from the dreaded FvsL syndrome. Quick somebody, get me a pill.<<<

I was getting rid of some old e-mail the other day. One had an interesting link. I clicked on it and got this even more interesting reply:

“The specified CGI application misbehaved by not returning a complete set of HTTP headers.” A misbehaving CGI – what is the world coming to?<<<

So what’s a knob?

Friday, Barb was fixing a dinner centered around a turkey breast that she bought at Honey Baked Ham. That triggered a memory, and she went to the pantry and brought out a package of stuffing mix for that she brought back from England. But the directions temporarily stumped her, because they called for a knob of butter.

What in the heck was a knob of butter? Who better to ask than Google? But even they were the epitome of imprecision. However it was not their fault – blame the British.

Here’s what I found:

"How much is a "knob of butter?" How much do you want it to be?"

"Certainly more than a dash, and well more than a pinch — neither of which seems the best way to measure butter, in any event. A knob of butter is a British term denoting some butter, and its use is sadly declining as zealous editors force more precision and science into our recipes and cookbooks. Even the loosest British cooks (and we mean that in the nice way) might get away with telling you to add a knob of butter on a television program. But if their cookbooks are published in the States, you can bet someone will have translated all those knobs into precise measurements."

"In our experience, a knob of butter is a couple tablespoons, more or less."

The stuffing was delicious.<<<

And before we leave food, check out this price comparison: (left)

Pop Quiz time, nursery rhyme division – Answers from last week:

What did Peter Piper pick? – A peck of pickled peppers

What did little Jack Horner eat in his corner? - His Christmas Pie

In Hickory, Dickory, Dock, what time was it when the mouse ran up the clock? - The clock struck one.

How many blackbirds were baked into a pie? - Four and twenty

What is Tuesday’s child full of? – Grace

No, I didn’t cheat. I knew every one. After all, I have a Master’s Degree.<<<

Here’s this week’s quiz:

What did Tom, Tom the piper’s son steal?
How old was pease-porridge in the pot?
What was the cat playing when the cow jumped over the moon?
What was Wee Willie Winkle wearing when he ran through the town?
Whom did Simple Simon meet while going to the fair?

WHO AM I? – BASEBALL EDITION - ANSWERS:

I played in 14 world Series games (seven in 1960 and seven in 1971)and hit safely in every one of them. And, in my career I had exactly 3,000 hits. – Roberto Clemente

I was the cover boy for the very first edition of Sports Illustrated in 1954. – Eddie Mathews<<<

There I was, sitting at my favorite table in Starbucks – the isolated one by the window – with my Coldstone, my cup of black and the sports section – and, in what I can only believe was a tribute to me, the background was straight from the program of my youth – “Your Hit Parade.”

I mean hearing, “Give me land/lots of land/under starry skies above/DON’T FENCE ME IN” was special. But when Doris Day and Buddy Clark started their duet of “I Love Somebody,” I teared up. I love that song, man.

“Don’t know why/she acts so shy/I really wouldn’t think of hurting a fly/Hope she doesn’t pass me by/’Cause if she did I’d die/I know I’d die.”

Chorus – come on now, all join in. If you have forgotten the lyrics, here they are: I love somebody, yes I do/Love somebody, yes I do/ Love somebody, yes I do/I love somebody – but I can’t say who.

Should you have a desire to know more, you will find the entire lyrics as well as vital information on the All-PAC 10 basketball team in a Nobody footnotes that will be sent separately.<<<

Farewell to one of the great American historians Arthur Schlesinger Jr., 1917-2007. (picture left)

ON MY BASKETBALL SOAP BOX

“Sports do not build character. They reveal it.”- John R. Wooden

Among the millions of NCAA rules, one of the most archaic is the one that makes the post-season conference tournament champions the automatic qualifiers for the “Big Dance.” The automatic should be to the team that wins the regular season championship. It is that marathon, not a tournament sprint from which the best team emerges. Post-season tournaments are fun and the winners, should they differ from the conference champions, could be given a berth BUT NOT THE AUTOMATIC ONE!<<<

MORE BASKETBALL

UCLA lost on a recruit this past week. Highly touted power forward Luke Babbitt, from Reno, chose Ohio State. The pain was somewhat lessened however when I read about his poor performance in the Nevada state championship game. According to this report from the Reno Appeal, he scored “36 points in a 677-58 win over Canyon Springs."

Roughly 5% of his team’s points? That’s not very good.<<<

Here’s an interesting sidelight from the Arizona/California game in Berkeley last Thursday. It seems that both teams almost got screwed. In the middle of the game the gym was mildly rocked by a 4.2 earthquake causing some screws to fall from the ceiling almost hitting a couple of Wildcats. (screwing # 1) Then Cal coach Ben Braun said one official, not understanding the quake-shake approached him, threatening to call a technical on the fans for throwing things. (screwing # 2)<<<

Today I am ambivalence personified, thrilled that my Bruins ended the regular season with 26 wins and only 4 losses and won the PAC-10 championship with a 15-3 record, appalled that they lost yesterday’s game to Washington 61-51. It is so easy to take the last game, won or lost, as the harbinger of things to come.

I am fighting the pessimistic devil perched on my shoulder, but I know he won’t go away until we win again. Still I have been thrilled 26 times and disappointed only 4. So here’s to the champions of the Pacific Ten. GO BRUINS!