Nobody 800

Sunday, January 3, 2010

Nobody # 800

Nobody Asked Me But:

800! From number 3, April 21, 1996, (Numbers 1 and 2 are lost in cyberspace) to number 800 on January 3, 2010 - who would have believed it?

Today was one of those mornings when the moon lit my Mac. It would be hard to find a better way to start my reading and writing. (Unless it is on a Diamondhead-view balcony in Waikiki, or in the SB’s across from the British Museum.)

PROMISES TO KEEP

I promise not to eat healthy in 10.

I promise to keep harping on the ill effects of paralyzed government.

I promise to use my Laker influence to trade Andrew Bynum for Chris Paul or Deron Williams.<<<

ACTION/REACTION

Action: “Tests reveal nothing wrong with Limbaugh's heart.”

Reaction: But says nothing about his brain.

THE DECADE

Persons of the decade: The evil and fanatical killers of 9/11 and their victims. Goodbye innocence and naivety. The oceans no longer protect us.

Person of the Decade: Barack Obama – his decision to run for president, his campaign, his election and his presidency mark a seminal moment in American history. His election, whether one agrees or disagrees with his policies, represents the best of America. The hatred aimed at him since his election, some because of his race, represents the worst.

Worst continuing trend of the decade – everybody who wants his or her 15 seconds of fame can grab it through reality TV or the internet. (Since nobody reads Nobody, I claim an exception.)

And while on the subject, is there anything less real than reality TV with their set-up situations and/or programmed judges and commentators?<<<

Most arrogant athlete – Bret Farve.

Best TV Shows

Sopranos

The Daily Show

Mad Men

The West Wing

Curb Your Enthusiasm

24

While on the subject, what am I missing? Critics and many people love “Entourage,” “Bored To Death” and “Men Of A Certain Age.” I found the first to be pretentious, the second, boring and the third uninvolving.

Best Movies

Lord Of The Rings Trilogy

Match Point

Lost In Translation

Million Dollar Baby

Letters From Iwo Jima

Honorable mention – (1) The Bourne trilogy - for fun, adventure and travel-inspiring cinematography. (2) The Dark Knight.

Biggest lies – (1) that Saddam Hussein had weapons of mass destruction and (2) that he had some link to Al Qaeda.

Phoniest ally – Pakistan

Most unpleasant athletes – Roger Clemens, Barry Bonds, Serena Williams.

Worst baseball contract - actually, the Dodgers had 3 of the top 10. Andrew Jones and Jason Schmidt are high on the list. But the absolute worst was the 5-year, $55M contract given to Darren Dreifort. The constantly injured Dreifort cost them $6.1M a win.

Cultural overkill – Too many movies staring or co-staring monster machines.

Cultural overkill # 2 – Too many movies in which the world is ending! The world is ending!

Biggest sporting story – Red Sox finally win in 04.

Best athlete - Tie between Tiger and Roger Federer.<<<

We know that in basketball most referees “let them play” at the end of games and rarely call fouls unless they are something close to flagrant. This makes no sense. What if football refs “let them play” and didn't call the defense for fouls at the end of games?<<<

New phrase with which to conjure: Significant otherwise - A person with whom you date and/or sleep because he/she is better than a certain alternative.<<<

NATURE'S MOST PERFECT FOOD OR FOOD COMBINATION

In my continuing search for a runner-up to chocolate malts, (half French vanilla, half coffee ice cream) I have a new candidate. I nominate garlic toast and Cabernet. I have loved this combo ever since the Mario’s days in Westwood when it was my food and drink of choice as I discussed just seen films such as “The Godfather” and “Shampoo.”<<<

BACK TO THE 15 SECONDS

The shame is that these 15 seconds of fame too often turn into 15 seconds of arrogance, coarseness, filth and hatred. Here are three samples. The first is a response to a column by T. J. Simers in the LA Times criticizing the parents of Abby Sunderland for their plan to allow their 16-year-old daughter to attempt a solo sailing voyage around the world - (which may well be the Sutherland’s grab at fame).

Jamie Redmond: "You don't like hearing of people like the Sunderland kids, Zac and Abby, because I imagine you are basically a total coward about facing life's challenges. The Sunderland kids have more guts in their little fingers than you will ever have, no matter how long you live. BTW, I am younger, smarter and better educated than you."

The next three are from Time Magazine Online and are responses to columnist Joe Klein’s defense of the health care bill.

What's the difference between a healthy piece of garbage and a "frail and ailing" piece of garbage? None that I see. (A reference to ailing 92-year-old Senator Byrd.)

And a big fat stinking perverted drunk is now is now a big fat stinking perverted dead drunk. Who cares? (This reference is to the late Senator Ted Kennedy.)

You lefties revere and adore big piles of human excrement, all the while casting dispersions on anything even remotely resembling Christianity. Uncanny.<<<

READER INVOLVEMENT - The biggest blunder of the decade. YOU CHOOSE

1. Cheney mistaking hunting buddy for a quail.

2. Mark Sanford thinking Buenos Aries was the Appalachian Trail.

3. Bush landing on the carrier deck and declaring, “Mission accomplished.”

I AM NOT UNCOUTH! I AM NOT UNCOUTH!

Yes, I detested Don DeLillo’s “Underworld,” listed by many critics as one of the best one hundred novels in America’s history, but so did author David Matthews. He hated “Underworld” because “a book can be long or it can be boring. But it should not be both.”

THINKING BACK – AND FORWARD

I think that if we ever go back to NYC, highly unlikely given our ages and the number of places we want to go, I will see many of the same sights more clearly. Without the rush of newness, I will be able to focus and absorb.<<<

IN CONCLUSION

In many ways, a terrible decade but it was also one in which I had many wonderful experiences, and, besides, any 10-year period survived by my loved ones, my friends and me couldn’t be all bad.<<<