Nobody 823

Sunday, July 4, 2010
Nobody # 823

Nobody Asked Me But:

Thomas Wolfe was wrong. You can go home again and will if you want great pizza. For some strange reason we had not been to Casa Bianca for over a year, but we returned yesterday, and their pizza remains the best. I have to be honest. Barbara no longer agrees, so you will have to listen to me and not “she.” If you have tried In-N-Out, you know that their burgers have a unique taste. Casa Bianca pizzas are the same. Their taste is different from all others. Better too.

Don’t believe me? Come by tomorrow night when we are having the left-over’s.<<<

I don’t care what the Activist Five on the Supreme Court says, there was no reason for the Founding fathers to include the phrase “A well-regulated militia being necessary” as part of the Second Amendment if they didn’t mean to connect gun ownership to being a member of some level of government militia.

Meanwhile in Chicago, the origin point for the gun control lawsuit decided earlier this week, gunshots killed ten people on Monday after 54, including a baby girl, were shot over the weekend. But, as the NRA says, if there were no guns those people would have been killed anyway, probably by sharply pointed pencils.<<<

You are fortunate indeed, because I have cleverly summarized the conservative-Republican judicial philosophy in one sentence: “I hate, I despise, I abhor judicial activism – except the kind that pulls the country to the right.”<<<

I am sure you notice that I write less about politics than I used to. This is because I find little redeeming virtue to offset the corruption and dishonesty. Almost everybody is on the take, whether it is for personal profit or reelection, and almost everybody lies.

Examples are Sunday morning political shows where truth is the most rare of commodities and spinning is the game’s name - to the point where to watch and listen is to invite motion-sickness.

As you know, I am a little disappointed with President Obama, although a part of that may be the product of my expectations, but I think he is a beacon of truth when compared to other politicians of both parties.<<<

ACTION/REACTION

Action: Is King Tut's Penis Missing?
Reaction: Or is this just a simple case of somebody having to whack it off before he went blind.

Action: "This was a war (Afghanistan) of Obama's choosing. This is not something the United States has actively prosecuted or wanted to engage in." RNC Chairman Michael Steele at a Connecticut fundraiser.
Reaction: WOW! Obama sent the military into Afghanistan in 2001? That’s some kind of power for a guy who wasn’t even a senator yet – and Palin said he was just a community organizer.

Action: Pope calls Belgian sex abuse raids ‘deplorable.’
Reaction: Belgium calls Pope’s handling of sex abuse deplorable.
Reaction # 2: I thought European nations long ago kicked the church out of secular issues such as crime.

Action: Many are saying that LeBron is “the most significant free agent in the history of sports?”
Reaction: Hardly. That honor belongs to Major League Baseball’s Curt Flood who, in 1969/70, fought the first, and therefore greatest, battle against the reserve clause. Although he lost by a 5-3 vote in the Supreme Court, he paved the way for free agency for professional athletes.

Action: Dangerous waves expected this holiday weekend.
Reaction: Oops! I thought it said wives. Time for a trip to the optometrist.

ALL-STAR SCREW-UP

During last Sunday’s ESPN broadcast of their baseball game of the week – a brutal Dodger loss to the Yankees – Joe Morgan opined that merit should be the determining factor in selecting players for the All-star game. I’m with Joe. Here’s an example: Atlanta’s rookie out fielder, Jason Heyward, is hitting .251, with 11 homeruns and 45 runs batted in. He is currently second in fan votes for the starting NL outfield. Detroit’s rookie outfielder, Brennan Boesch, who is batting .338, with 12 home runs and 43 runs batted in, is not even among the top 15 vote getters for a starting spot in the AL outfield.

MORE BASEBALL

The Bruin baseball team had a great season even if they lost an 11-inning battle to South Carolina in the College World Series final. My advice for next season: Recruit a couple of power hitters and stop bunting the damn ball so much!<<<

QUOTE OF THE WEEK

"To know him (Coach John Wooden) was to know this: He was better than advertised. Better even than people thought he was. How many people can you say that about?" Paul Westphal – this all-time USC great was one of the few recruits that Coach didn’t land.

MOVIE REVIEW

“Knight and Day.” Tom Cruise was very good. And, although I am not usually a big fan, Cameron Diaz was too. I had enough fun watching to make it worth the admission price.<<< (jt)

AND HERE ARE TWO MORE FOR MY COLLECTION OF CAUSTIC ONE-LINE REVIEWS

"My Last Five Girlfriends is a stab at an anti- romantic comedy, but with too dull a blade." (From the LA Times)

“The Last Airbender is a joyless, soulless, muddled mess." (From the LA Daily News)

QUICKIES

What’s in a name? Thad Turnipseed is Alabama’s director of athletic facilities.<<<

Did you know that 97% of the NCAA budget comes from basketball. And yet football rules the day. Go figure?<<<

I didn’t think this up, but I like it: If James Worthy is "Big Game James,” shouldn’t Derek Fisher be "Big Swish Fish?"

THESE QUESTIONS FROM A RECENT GED EXAM ARE ANSWERED BY HIGH SCHOOL JUNIORS.

Q. What guarantees may a mortgage company insist on?
 A. If you are buying a house they will insist that you are well endowed.

Q. Give the meaning of the term Caesarean section? 
A. The caesarean section is a district in Rome.




It is difficult to fault Time for having Titanic at the top of its greatest disaster film list but shouldn’t any disaster list include that great box office disaster Heaven’s Gate? “Gate,” made in 1980 cost $44M and returned $3.5 M each in domestic and foreign gross. The adjusted for inflation loss is $104.5M.

BEST FUNNY MOVIE ONE-LINERS – PART II

”You can’t fool me! There ain’t no sanity clause!” Chico Marx, A Night at the Opera (1935) (I used this one A LOT in class. You can’t say I wasn’t corny.)

On this, her 234th birthday, may my country stand tall and rededicate itself to liberty and justice for all.

And while on the subject of independence, my favorite independent bookstores are: Book Passage in Corte Madera, Queen Anne Books in Seattle, Powells in Portland, Warwick’s in La Jolla and Malaprop’s in Asheville, North Carolina.

(The picture at the beginning was taken outside the office at Willows in Woodenville, WA. The one at the end is from vancouver, BC